Friday, December 15, 2006

Summer's Journal: Twenty-Eigth Entry

I saw that strange girl again today. All week I had been thinking about why I had been so mean to her. What made me do that? It wasn’t me being any part of me, was it?

When I saw her, it all came back, the Jealousy. The Hatred of how beautiful she was, and compared to her how ugly I was, I forced myself to walk up to her. When I met her I shook with hatred and I wanted to hit her.

“Please don’t hit me,” she pleaded, “I don’t know why everyone hates me…”

I turned from her, but I felt her still there, still more beautiful then I was, “I don’t know why I hate you.”

“You’re human…” I paused, I was human… Somewhere… “Why do humans hate you?” I asked. “I don’t know,” she sobbed.

I turned to her, I still wanted to hit her, I still wanted to be her, but I held back those primitive human urges, “I’m sorry.”

“You can’t help it,” she said softly, “Its not your fault… You saved me… I owe you my life, I had to come back to see you again. You’re the first person who was ever nice to me.”

I knelt down to her, and I went to touch her but I retracted scared I would hurt her. She was so like a child, something kicked inside of me, I had to protect her. But at the same time I had to hurt her, I had to be her. “Why do you invoke such feelings in me?” I asked.

A tear rolled down her cheek, “I don’t know… I don’t know what you are feeling.” I choked on my own words,“I want to be you.”

She scooted back as quickly as she could, “Don’t say that,” she growled. It was the most violent I had ever noticed her. She was always so passive, “You don’t know what its like to be me. You don’t want to be me!”

She stood, and I stood, but she had run away by the time I was able to begin my chase after her…

Maybe Chris will know something about this girl… Maybe anyone will know something about this girl. I am frustrated that I don’t.

-Summer Dawn

1 Comments:

Blogger Jean-Luc Picard said...

Be careful, Summer; I sense problems ahead.

9:45 AM  

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