Summer's Journal: Thirty-Sixth Entry
It was ten hours before I realized what had happened. When I did, I broke out crying, my mother and father were sitting there as I read. The book dropped form my hand, and my eyes filled with tears and I curled into a ball.
My father began to search around the area for whatever it was that had done it to me, and my mother rushed to me immediately. She held me tightly to her, but I didn’t register her touch. The only reason I am thinking so clearly now, is because my mind has shifted to revenge.
Revenge will cover up any emotions we have, and it will give us new purpose.
I feel totally violated. It wasn’t a normal human kind of violation, and I think that scared me even more. Someone got into my head, and read my thoughts. I didn’t realize that they were when they were doing it.
I didn’t have any defense, I didn’t have any time to react, and I had no idea who it was. But someone was able to get past my defenses. My defenses. I don’t even know how they did it.
The only reason I could tell it happened was because I felt them straining through my mind, ten hours later. I tried to explain it to my mother through my tears, and my rocking back and fourth. But she couldn’t understand. My father, after he made his rounds, didn’t understand either.
My mom never had to worry about it, her thoughts were primal. That was her benefit for being a werewolf. Her primal thoughts were surfaced about her others. My father’s mind is dead, he doesn’t have to worry about it.
I need Aurora. I need my godmother. She’s the only one who can understand. She’s the only one who can help me. I’m crying again… He, I use the word he because the male sex would be the only one to violate a girl’s mind for her thoughts, knows about my boyfriend. He knows about my cousin. He knows about what I do to help people. He knows that this makeup mask I wear is a façade.
He knows my age, my birthdate, my deepest darkest secrets, but yet he didn’t pry into my family, to find out about them, or where I live. He knows what I can do magically, and probably even more than I know. There are things I wish I knew about my magic.
My parents tried to make me feel better, bless them, but they couldn’t associate my problem with their own life. I hugged them, and I clung to them. I’m better now. But I may hurt or kill someone tomorrow.
I’m not sure I can go through with it.
-Dawn
My father began to search around the area for whatever it was that had done it to me, and my mother rushed to me immediately. She held me tightly to her, but I didn’t register her touch. The only reason I am thinking so clearly now, is because my mind has shifted to revenge.
Revenge will cover up any emotions we have, and it will give us new purpose.
I feel totally violated. It wasn’t a normal human kind of violation, and I think that scared me even more. Someone got into my head, and read my thoughts. I didn’t realize that they were when they were doing it.
I didn’t have any defense, I didn’t have any time to react, and I had no idea who it was. But someone was able to get past my defenses. My defenses. I don’t even know how they did it.
The only reason I could tell it happened was because I felt them straining through my mind, ten hours later. I tried to explain it to my mother through my tears, and my rocking back and fourth. But she couldn’t understand. My father, after he made his rounds, didn’t understand either.
My mom never had to worry about it, her thoughts were primal. That was her benefit for being a werewolf. Her primal thoughts were surfaced about her others. My father’s mind is dead, he doesn’t have to worry about it.
I need Aurora. I need my godmother. She’s the only one who can understand. She’s the only one who can help me. I’m crying again… He, I use the word he because the male sex would be the only one to violate a girl’s mind for her thoughts, knows about my boyfriend. He knows about my cousin. He knows about what I do to help people. He knows that this makeup mask I wear is a façade.
He knows my age, my birthdate, my deepest darkest secrets, but yet he didn’t pry into my family, to find out about them, or where I live. He knows what I can do magically, and probably even more than I know. There are things I wish I knew about my magic.
My parents tried to make me feel better, bless them, but they couldn’t associate my problem with their own life. I hugged them, and I clung to them. I’m better now. But I may hurt or kill someone tomorrow.
I’m not sure I can go through with it.
-Dawn
posted by Summer Dawn O'Ciardha at 10:15 AM
2 Comments:
Thank Aurora for the milk, oreos and milk are great. All of what your going through is part of life, life is suffering and its something we all need to accept.
Only then can we pursue the happiness we want. I hope you get your happiness Dawn.
Try not to kill anyone. People get annoyed about that.
Post a Comment
<< Home